What I Learned About Test Tube Babies

Okay, folks.

Get ready for test tube babies.

Kids as we know them... made in factories. Identical twins? Forget about it. We'll have sets of 8, 22, 54, even 96 human beings, all looking almost... well, identical. They'll be cultured, conditioned, labeled, and even put into what would be their very own middle school clique before leaving the womb (excuse me, tube) and as soon as they become those cute, living, breathing, crying, pooping babies we love, they'll start to be conditioned to love every moment of their lives as we knew they were pre-determined to be.

At least according to Aldous Huxley.

I'm no enemy of genetic engineering, but this futuristic, and seemingly hypothetical situation involving a completely genetically engineered world are at best, propaganda. If scientists want to create living cells from other cells, fantastic. They can grow hearts, livers, kidneys. Just don't grow the next generation just yet, doctor. Not only would my manufacturing process be terribly out-of-date, but we're not exactly ready for something like this at this point in history. Let the stubborn few of society catch up to the idea of global warming, start teaching evolution in ALL the schools, then start creating kids back in the lab.

The idea of a predestined social class, however, is far from new. The status quo just got more preset through any test tube baby's 17 years of conditioning. Not only are they put into a social caste, but they love it! Hypnopaedia (real word, who knows!?) is a useful tool in this future society. Like hypnotism, except it's legal for the government to perform it on kids while they sleep. The Epsilons are the morons of society, followed by the much smarter Deltas, Gammas, Betas, then the highly regarded Alphas. The Alphas sit at the top of the pyramid looking down at all others, but this is not a bad thing after hypnopaedia. The Gammas are stoked they're smarter than Deltas, and absolutely delighted that they don't have to work as hard as the Alphas. The Epsilons are as happy as their little minds can be to be surrounded by intelligent people who treat them like just another part of society and who are there to protect them from any bad to come. See? It's perfectly legit... just different. Maybe the US will give it a try. But before teaching them to be happy with being an Alpha or a Gamma, lets teach our kids about the dinosaurs.