After all, you can't play Electro-Magnetic Golf by the rules of Centrifugal Bumble Puppy

After another hard day's work, it's I who ought to be playing a lovely game of Electro-magnetic golf.

Instead, I'll write about it.

But John, towards the end of his career as a member of civilized society, has no time and no interest in such a game. So I guess I'll be writing about something else. Such as what the savage decides to do instead of civilized life. Any conditioned new worlder would not imagine such a choice. Being alone is terrifying in itself, but alone for days and weeks and months is nearly unbearable. So John is left to choose whatever uninhabited space he can find outside of bustling city life, and gets assigned to an abandoned lighthouse where he can see the burning city lights from the upper story windows. It is too nice a view for one intent on punishing himself. But finally, John the savage gets exactly what he wants. He sees no one for days on end. He is completely and totally alone, praying to gods like Pookong and Jesus and animal spirits of all sorts...

And still, he thinks of Lenina.

So the self punishment continues, as well as the solitude.
Until...
Three Delta-minus workers stumble across the savage in the midst of his self punishment ritual, whipping himself and crying out prayers to the gods.
And just like that, John's solitude and self purification comes to an end.

After the first few curious onlookers, reporters begin to hassle this unique man onto the camera. When John dispatches a reporter or two with a swift kick to the coccix or by shooting an arrow straight for a news helicopter, more fill in and multiply like rabbits. Soon after, the door of his lighthouse implodes with the overflow of reporters searching to capture another shot of this savage's unique behavior. The onlookers and reporters ask for only one thing.

"The whip stunt! Do the whip stunt again!"

The conditioned idiots are trained to want none other than entertainment, thus it's not in the least bit their fault. But in no way is this riot a fault of John's. And in the midst of the chaos, Lenina walks in.

Choosing to beat Lenina with the whip was possibly not the smoothest move of Johns. But everybody's happy nowadays. Whether or not he knew it, John too got a part of what he wanted.
In the excitement, a rioter calls out "orgy porgy"
And altogether in a soma daze, the crowd does just what it does best.

John awakes with total regret.
And hangs himself.